She's Lying.

So there's a billboard in town that says only that. It's said only that for weeks. It's very weird and I don't geddit. However...! Last night I drove by et voila! It suddenly seems there is more to the story!

Printed above it are the words, "She said she wants a vacuum for christmas" (or something to that effect.)

She's Lying.

Buy Diamonds, etc...

It's a freakin diamond ad. If I have to hear ONE MORE jewelry ad saying you should buy your woman some jewels or you're in the doghouse, I may scream obscenities to myself. Hell I will anyway, I'd just have a reason then.

How has it become that you are less of a man if you don't buy your woman hundreds of dollars of diamonds every occasion? And how is it that women are so fucking shallow that they'd expect it, or be mortally unhappy, to the point of breaking up, divorcing, forcing to sleep on couch, whatever? Bleh. It's all Bushit.

It's the ad companies who force these ideas on people. Sorta like the fucktard neocons saying merry christmas as a dig. What the fuck is THAT about, I want to know. Last night this ASSHOLE at Borders was buying a bunch of shit and I said happy holidays, whatever, have a good night, you know, something on autopilot as he was finishing up with the sale. He says to me, "Please tell me Merry Christmas!" so I said, allright, merry christmas. (with my characteristic "I think you're nuts" shrug, and not much emotion.) Like I give a ratfuck. It's a freaking PHRASE, not a kick to the ass. So this jerk has a total attitude of superiority like he's won $5 in the lotto, and tells me his story of having to "make his bank teller say merry christmas, and she wouldn't, even though she's known him for forever." He was totally weird about it, as if it's some battle he was in over something important. So I just shrugged again...cause you know, WHAT-EVER.

Fucktard neocons. It's a pagan fucking holiday. You're buying GIFTS to give each other, 8 months after Jesus would have been born, cause some Pope decided to put the holiday together with a pagan solstice, tree lighting day. So if this stupid asshole is so into christmas and the meaning of it, why is he spending $300 on the altar of commercialism? Presents will probably go under his pagan symbol tree, and he'll feel righteous as hell. Well good for him. I really wish some part of him understands how incredibly stupid he appears to me as a bystander. I have waited on him before and I am more convinced than ever, every time he comes in, that he's a fucktard. And he is BREEDING. He brings his pregnant wife over to give her caffeine. Nice. Smart folk. Not. Jesus. It's so frustrating knowing so many idiots are out there, and breeding, and probably voting. At least he brings his dyke sister in with him each time, at least she's not likely to continue that line. He probably hasn't figured out that she's gay yet, even with the SuperButch dyke uniform/spiked mullet/leather combo she's got going. Well won't that be fun some holiday...pardon me, Christmas, when she shows up to the dinner with a...roommate. I wish I could see his face. Ha. Oh the beautiful irony - he's Soooooooooooooooooo concerned with strangers toeing the line, yet his own sister is not in the game.
Merry fucking christmas, asshole.